The Devil and I by Kay Alastor

Author:Kay Alastor [Alastor, Kay]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: anonymous
Published: 2021-07-24T18:30:00+00:00

***

A heavy knocking on the front door startles me awake. I didn't mean to fall asleep, but the pleasure was too good, and Lucas felt too safe. He coaxed me to sleep by playing with my hair, watching the movie in silence. I hadn't meant to drift off, but I sure as hell was awake now. Pulled from serenity and thrust back into the state of fear I was so used to living in. I came awake with a gasp, my body moving on autopilot as I tried to run from the man holding me. My body jerking violently in a frantic attempt to escape the unknown threat.

“Hey! It's okay, Rayna. It's just the pizza guy.” Lucas did his best to speak to me calmly, but it was tough to come down from the surge of panic that crashed through my body like a tsunami. He pulls me back into his arms, this time facing him, one hand pressed firmly against my cheek. I've been hyperventilating, which has Lucas's gaze narrowed with concern. “Breathe for me, baby. You're safe. I won't let anything hurt you,” he promises, repeating the words over and over again until my breathing starts to even out. It doesn't take too long before a calmness begins to settle over me, which seems to make him pretty damn happy. He leans in to place a gentle kiss on my lips, one hand stroking down through my hair.

“He's already gone. I prepaid and told him to knock and leave it at the door. You're safe,” he tells me, and I release the rest of my tension on a deep exhale.

“I'm sorry,” I confess, my voice still shaky from the comedown.

“Don't apologize. You have nothing to be sorry for. I understand. I just... I want you to know you're safe with me. I know that will take time, but I need you to try to trust me.”

I know it wasn't his intention, but I feel guilty for not having better control of my emotional responses. Ever since I was assaulted, I startle so easily. It's become my new normal, even though I recognize that it's not healthy. I know it's a trauma response, so I try not to be too hard on myself. I remind myself that this man is a police officer, and is well equipped to handle any threats. Reasoning with myself isn't easy when my brain has been altered by such a horrific trauma.

Lucas settles me back on the couch before getting up and walking over to the front door. I bite my lip as he opens it and leans down to grab the box of pizza left behind. His eyes wander through the darkness for several long moments before he steps back inside and locks the door behind him.

“All clear. Nobody is out there,” he tells me, walking back over and setting the pizza down on the coffee table. Not wanting to dwell on it anymore, I force myself to focus on the delicious smell of the recently delivered food.

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